I'd Rather Be a Guest

As I slowly am starting my recaps and am going through my pictures, I'm really struck with a lot of affection for our little wedding. I had an amazing time planning it, I really enjoyed the day, and I get a lot of joy thinking about it now. However, I've come to the conclusion that I much prefer being a guest at a wedding than being the bride.

I prefer this experience:




to this:


Photo by Josh Levinson

Although I definitely prefer the short hair on Mr. Knitting!

This realization seems really obvious to me now based on what I know about myself, but I was actually surprised to discover this. I attended 5 weddings in the year and a half before my wedding and each time, while I was really excited for the bride, I also couldn't wait for it to be my turn. Being a bride seemed like one of the most fun things ever.

However, now that I'm on the other side, I can definitely say I prefer being a guest.

Don't get me wrong, there are definitely benefits to being the bride. The room is filled with all your favourite people, everyone is incredibly nice to you, the food, music, and decor are all to your taste, you get to marry your most favourite person ever...etc.

Those parts of being a bride were lovely. However, there were some other parts that were not quite as lovely. I felt really rushed the whole day and I felt a lot of personal responsibility for my guests' happiness. Due to my introverted nature I also found it a bit tiring to be the centre of attention all day. My wedding also really stressed out one of my most favourite people and that also definitely affected my experience as a bride.

It also took me quite a while to recover after our wedding. I'm not entirely sure what it was I needed to recover from since our wedding was wonderful and really everything I wanted, but my mind and body were both really exhausted for a couple of months after our wedding. I suspect I just needed some time to process such a huge event, but this was not a quick process for me.

In contrast, as a guest I love just showing up at a wedding and feeling like my only goals are to make the bride and groom feel amazing about the super awesome wedding they planned and to chase down waiters to make sure I'm able to eat the maximum number of appetizers (no, I'm not kidding). Then, after the wedding I'm able to move on to real life immediately.

I think the huge difference for me is that at other people's weddings I don't feel responsible for the happiness of others.

So while I absolutely loved our wedding and am having such an amazing time writing about it for all of you, I have to say that I'm glad it's over and I can just go back to being a guest.

Where do you stand on this? Would you rather be a bride or a guest?

Did you need a significant amount of recovery time after your wedding?